I have alwayssss been someone who’s obsessed with goals, targets, lists etc. and as much as I can’t really stand the ‘new year new me’ bullshit that doesn’t really stop me from creating resolutions anyway. When you’re younger I remember thinking it was just about giving up eating biscuits or cake for some unknown reason and then failing on the first day in but not even realizing, as if you never set the goal in the first place. I think resolutions are about trying to create a better YOU because I think most of us at times are unhappy with the people we are and through life we try to recreate ourselves and create version 2.0, 3.0 etc. We as people will never stop changing and growing but the most important thing is that you are the best person you can be and are happy and comfortable being the person you are. Some (actually all!) of these points are pretty cliche but I find them pretty important for me and sometimes when you’re in the mood it’s an enlightening thing to think about
1. Try new things
I used to be pretty scared about ever trying anything new but at the same time I aspired to be adventurous, brave and experienced. I like to think of myself as enjoying change and new experiences but I still get nervous doing things that are out of my comfort zone -just like anybody would I guess. I like to think of it like experience points. The more new thing you try and more the more change you experience, the more confident and outgoing you will become and I know it’s scary doing something on your own for the first time but it was new for everyone once. Everyone’s been in your position
2. Be sociable
I used to be the type of person who would only stick to her own social group and not talk to anyone else. Once or twice I have been the person who had to sit on her own because none of her friends were in. A few months ago I would have said I was more introverted than extroverted, enjoying my own company and keeping to myself more often than not. Over the years, just like people focus and worry about their flaws, I worried about my social skills or lack of thinking I had social anxiety, thinking myself boring etc. but because of recent experiences I have proven to myself that I can get on in any situation and be more extroverted. People never stop growing and becoming more confident and there’s always going to be people you don’t get on with or clash with but guess what…it doesn’t matter because there are manymanymanyyy more people out there to meet through all sorts of situations and other people shape the person you are.
3. Do things that make YOU happy
You wanna do something? Stop with the excuses and go do it who’s stopping you? A few years ago, I was pretty depressed, bored and upset and apart from school and the obligatory things you have to do I don’t think I really did anything. But you have to because your own happiness is the most important thing in the long-term at the end of the day. Stop depending on others and go do the stuff you want to do. If you love yourself then you can love and be loved by others.
4. Let go of grudges
I think a grudge can be the most energy-sapping thing and 90% of the time the grudge is over some tiny thing that doesn’t even matter. I’ve held many grudges in the past, usually over misunderstandings or petty things that I soon forget what they were even about. The worst thing is when you let the grudge become so out of hand that you lose a relationship because the grudge becomes bigger than the problem itself which could’ve been solved with a simple conversation or apology. Free your conscience by forgiving and moving on. Even if they don’t you will know that you were the bigger person and that it’s no longer on your conscience.
5. Live for the here and now
Shit happened in the past I’m not denying it but everyone has setbacks and knocks, it’s the moving on from them is what counts. I used to be focused on so regretful of it that I let it define me as a person and make me scared of any social contact. But you can’t go back and change the past so what’s the point of even thinking about it. Move on. Life will just pass you by if you spend too long regretting your past and worrying about the future. Seize the present with both hands and roll with it.